INSIGHT & ATTACHMENT-BASED THERAPY
So much of how you love, worry, and protect yourself was learned early. It can be unlearned.
Insight-oriented therapy that helps you understand where your patterns came from – often in your earliest relationships – so you can gently change them.
In person in Encinitas and online across California.
What is attachment-based therapy?
A lot of what we struggle with as adults – anxiety in relationships, people-pleasing, fear of abandonment, difficulty trusting or being close – traces back to how we were cared for, seen, and responded to early in life.
This is the heart of attachment theory: the idea that our earliest bonds shape the blueprint for how we connect, to others and to ourselves.
Here's the hopeful part, and it's important: your attachment patterns are not fixed. They formed as adaptive responses – smart, protective strategies that made sense given what you were navigating at the time. But an adaptation that kept you safe as a child can quietly keep you stuck as an adult.
When you can recognize those patterns for what they are – old survival strategies that no longer serve you – you can begin to move out of them. And in the context of safe, supportive, trusting relationships (including the therapy relationship itself), attachment can genuinely evolve toward greater security over time. You are not locked into how you learned to love.
How your past keeps showing up in the present.
The psychodynamic side of this work looks at how the past keeps showing up in the present – often without our awareness. We tend to reenact old dynamics, repeat the roles we were assigned in our families, and relate to people now through patterns we absorbed long ago. When we slow down and trace those threads – the family roles, the things that were modeled, the dynamics you grew up inside – the present starts to make a different kind of sense.
And something quietly powerful happens in that understanding: self-judgment begins to soften into self-compassion. When you see why you developed a pattern – that it was never a flaw, but a reasonable response to what you were living through – it becomes much harder to keep blaming yourself for it. That compassion is often where the real change begins.
How human of you
How I Use Attachment-based Therapy
This root-level insight work is the foundation beneath much of what I do. It pairs naturally with nervous-system and somatic work – we understand where a pattern came from and help your body learn a new way of being.
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What we’ll explore
Your attachment patterns, and how they show up in your relationships now
The early experiences and family dynamics that shaped you
Recurring patterns you can't seem to think your way out of
The beliefs about yourself you formed long ago – and whether they're still true
How to relate to yourself, and others, with more security and freedom
Anxiety in relationships and fear of abandonment
People-pleasing and difficulty with boundaries
Feeling like you keep repeating the same patterns
Low self-worth rooted in early experiences
Wanting to understand yourself at a deeper level
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What Attachment-Based Therapy can help with
Fees & treatment plan
Together we’ll explore if Attachment-Based Therapy is right to integrate into your treatment plan.
Frequently Asked Questions
What are attachment styles?
Attachment styles (often described as secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized) are patterns for how we connect in close relationships, shaped by our earliest bonds. Understanding yours can be a powerful lens for making sense of your relationships – and, importantly, they're not permanent. Within safe, trusting relationships, attachment patterns can shift toward greater security over time.
What is psychodynamic therapy?
It's a depth-oriented approach that explores how your past, your unconscious patterns, and your early relationships influence how you feel and behave today. The goal is insight that leads to real, lasting change – not just symptom management.
Do we just focus on my childhood?
No. We look at the past only to understand the present. The point is always to help you feel and live differently now.
Can this work alongside body-based therapy?
Absolutely – that's how I work. Insight from this approach plus nervous-system and somatic work is a powerful combination: understanding the pattern, and changing it in the body.
When you're ready, I'm here
Reaching out is often the hardest part. If you're feeling even a small pull toward this work, let's start with a free consultation – no pressure, no commitment, just a conversation.